Saturday, December 31, 2016

Emancipation

[This was a post that was done some unknown time ago. I've been doing posts to my computer directly instead of uploading them. This was made sometime Spring 2016]


It feels weird wanting someone again. Feeling jealous about someone again. It’s something that hasn’t happened in a long time. Such a long time that I’m not sure what else to do except write my feelings about it here.
Just like usual, I will not say her full name, only that her name is Sarah. That should be enough for future me to read. Future me to possibly remember this time.
It’s an odd feeling to say the least. Confusing. Not so much the feelings itself I guess but I’m more confused about what to do with them. I have a deep yearning from the pit of my soul that wants to be with her, but I can’t really put my finger on why. She’s adorable and cute and the fear that’s associated with all of that comes rushing back.
I’ve been on a couple of dates since breaking up with Beth and one of them was extremely subpar and the other one was okay. It can sometimes sicken me with how well I can act in front of people. Other times it comes as a relief. Honestly I’m not sure how I feel about that with either of the previous women.
Immediately upon seeing one of them I knew that I was not interested, but I lied to myself to the point of believing it; just for a moment. I just wasn’t physically attracted. She had a beautiful mind but I was far from attracted to her and even though I know that underneath the clothes I am nothing, I still could not see myself with her. I even went out on a second date, but it was at that second date I realized that that was not what I wanted. Am I terrible for having a preference? I like to think not. Am I terrible for having pretended and entertained the possibility of a third date and more? Absolutely monstrous.
The person was like if I had found a way to enjoy the tumblr culture I had come to spite. Them themselves (they prefer to have the pronoun ‘them/they’ used) had some interesting sides to their personality. They had their moments where they were adorable, but the farther I descended down, I realized that that too was not what I wanted. She very much had the mindset that a lot of people observe about teenagers. The ‘This is how the world is/I’m wise beyond my years/I’m so complex’ mentality. The entire world underneath their thumb. These were the people who I have a great distaste for. These are the people who see things in one view without being able to even entertain the idea of the other side having merit. Sometimes there isn’t even another side but they create hostility until a line is drawn and sides are cast.
I did sleep with that girl. For a horndog like me, I thought it would have been a lot more fun. Perhaps I was going through the motions but I think that deep down I knew that I just didn’t like this girl either. An hour. I had sex for an hour only to peak at nothing. It was fun sure, but it was as fun as a casual game that you play competitively. Enjoyable in the meantime, but it has no meaning at the end. Is that harsh and cruel things to say? Yup. Probably definitely. But that’s why I write them here where nobody can read it.

Now back to this girl that’s been tiptoeing in the fissures of my brain. It’s an oddity for sure. Almost every girl that I’ve dated up until this point has demanded my attention. Whether it was because I was that infectious or because they enjoyed me that much, I’ve never really been able to know. Sarah is not like this though and that kind of scares me. She doesn’t demand my attention which is something that is new for me.
I’m so used to people who claim to have affection for me be so wrapped up in me that at this point I start to worry when it doesn’t happen. It’s fucked up and egocentric for sure, but it’s a creeping feeling that scratches at me. I know that really it’s probably just how a normal human being functions, not wanting to wrap up all their time in me, but damn if it’s the oddest feeling.
Sarah showed me a new artist. One that I had never heard of in a style that I can’t even really place. It’s an artist that goes by the name of Emancipator. Music is an extremely important part of my life. For the longest time it was only through music that I was able to feel. In the days where I was able to shut off all feeling, it was only through music that I could experience a broader range of emotions. When someone shows me music that I can enjoy it endears me to them.
When I started listening to this music that Sarah showed me, it made me swoon.
Deep, soulful notes pierce the light and easy percussive beats. Every song feels like I’m gingerly walking through serenity. I can work or I can relax while listening to this. It’s like my ears have discovered new food and I can’t get enough of it right now. However, it’s a dish that cannot be devoured. It’s a dish that has to be slowly taken in.
Sarah is soft and her scent intoxicating. I feel almost like a creep.
But she does all these little things that just make me want her even more. I cuddled with her and the way she curled up next to me, the way she nuzzled me, the small bites to my hand, it just felt right.
But for what? What scares me the most is that I don’t know what to do if we did start dating. What’s my end game? I can’t see this being a long term thing. I barely know what I want to do with my life and she’s just starting hers. I don’t wants kids and I don’t want to get married. I don’t know what I want outside of just wanting her. But what kind of selfish goal is that?
I’ll have to think about it deeper.

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